Hide your wife, hide your kids. Hide your grammy, hide your grampy because this is not just any war.
Sunday dim sum is a special kind of war. It is guerrilla warfare.
Ambush, sabotage, hit and run – there is no escape because if you are one of those sad saps who has one of those job things that keeps you occupied from Monday to Friday, Sunday might just be your only day.
For the love of dumpling, I found myself at Happy Valley this past Sunday risking it all. Mobs, squawking asian ladies, shrieking children, old asian men spitting – be prepared to do battle and take no prisoners because when you’re in the trenches, you have only yourself.
Out here, there is no body of law to govern anything you do because this is war.
Phase One: Release the Dumplings.
Siu Mai, though juicy, are on the smaller side and slightly bland. Still, these are decent, but you’re going to want to slather on the red chili sauce.
Steamed Prawn and Corn Dumplings are massive and terrible. Don’t do it, just don’t do it. Whoever decided it was a good idea to mess with the classic Har Gao was clearly deranged because with the rubbery corn and almost mealy shrimp texture, this was a colossal disappointment.
If it wasn’t for the enoki mushrooms, the Deep Fried Taro Dumplings filled with a tasty pork mixture would have made this dish a shining star. As it was, these dumplings were not terrible, just a bit odd.
The Spareribs in Black Bean Sauce were moist, tasty, and fatty. Meatier pieces would have been nice but we take what we can get when doing battle.
Phase Two: Deep Fried Roll Out.
Shrimp Spring Rolls glistening with a golden sheen and stuffed with garlic shrimp are a success and so were the Rice Rolls with Chinese Donuts because when your crispy fried dough is smothered in peanut and hoisin sauce, it’s hard to go wrong.
When it comes to this phase, Deep Fried Peppery Squid is always a main event. With a crunchy exterior and chewy interior seasoned with the perfect blend of salt, pepper, and chilis, good look stopping at just one.
Phase Three: Not for the Faint of Heart.
Growing up, chicken feet were always as normal to me as chicken drumsticks so imagine my surprise when I learned that this is not the case for everyone, especially if you are not of the asian variety.
Piping hot, incredibly tasty, and with fall off the bone meat, the Black Bean Chicken Feet were a hit today.
Phase Four: Diabetes
Now is the time for dessert and even if you’re full, no dim sum experience would be complete without the Egg Tart.
Perfectly sweet and buttery with a beautifully flakey shell, Happy Valley’s egg tarts might just be their claim to fame. If you do anything at all, do this.
BBQ Pork Pineapple Buns are also a winner. Nab one of these when they’re warm because there’s nothing like the comforting combination of sugary cookie crunch and fatty pork.
Emerging in a MSG stupor with minimal battle wounds, would I return?
A true warrior never backs down from her duties and when most dishes are priced just under $5, it’s not unfair.
Chinese standard clean complete with an entire parking lot and boasting some solid dim sum, this dim sum girl leaves just a little bit happier and a lot rounder.